Home Birth After Cesarean Story

I woke up on a Thursday morning at 4:30 AM with an achy/sore feeling from my lower abdomen all the way through my legs. I was so uncomfortable that I could not go back to sleep. It was a feeling that I had felt once or twice before in the weeks prior, so I wasn’t sure if it would lead to labor this time around. After about an hour, I began to doze off again, when suddenly I woke up to the first wave sensation around 6:00 AM. I wondered to myself, “Did I just feel what I think I felt? Am I imagining things?” After several minutes, I felt another wave so I decided to start timing them. The first few waves were about 15 minutes apart but suddenly they began averaging 5 minutes apart! I woke up my husband and said “I think I’m in labor,” and then explained to him what I had been feeling. He had gone to bed late the night before, and I was still in a bit of denial, so I told him to stay in bed and I would let him know if the sensations persisted. I texted my aunt who planned on joining us to take some photos and help watch our toddler. She lives about an hour away so I wanted her to prepare to head over. After a few more waves, I decided to text my midwife again who lives about 10-15 minutes away. I wasn’t ready for her to head over but I wanted her to be prepared to block off her day. After informing everyone on my birth team about how labor was progressing, I went to the kitchen to have a snack because I was hungry and wanted to fuel up in case this was indeed the real deal. I had coconut yogurt with chia seeds, some dates, and toast with raspberry jam. After I was done eating, I put on my Sade playlist and placed my stockpile of coconut water in the refrigerator to cool down as I worked through contractions. 

The sensations commenced at a consistent pace, so by 6:30 AM I woke up my husband again. He quickly got up and we began preparing- he did some dishes and charged the vlog camera while I gathered towels and breathed through each wave. Before 7:00 AM hit, the sensations were averaging 2-3 minutes apart. Somehow, part of me was still in denial that I was in labor because the contractions felt so manageable. I texted my aunt, “I’m not sure if you should head over. I’m gonna feel bad if it’s a false alarm.” Then, by 7:50 AM I told her to definitely head over. At the same time, I was also keeping my midwife in the loop and she offered to come by whenever I felt ready for her support and presence. She asked that I keep her updated when I feel a shift in intensity. At 8:00 AM I told my midwife that I felt good still but things were definitely taking a turn. I went poop and had three contractions while sitting on the toilet (sitting on the toilet can help dilation and bring the baby down a.k.a. the dilation station). I let her know that I was beginning to vocalize and my hands felt tingly. My son woke up shortly after and I immediately told him, “Baby is coming today!” He jumped out of bed and was so excited. We had done a lot of prep work throughout the months- watching home birth vlogs daily on YouTube, bought him a baby doll, and spoke about the baby in my belly. My husband went out to walk the dog while I labored on all fours with my birth ball. My husband and I both wanted to shower before my midwife came over so I asked her to leave in 10-15 minutes. I got into the shower by 8:30 AM and remember thinking- THANK GOODNESS I ASKED HER TO HEAD OVER- because things were getting intense. As I showered, I began to shed some tears. I wasn’t crying from the pain but more so from the realization that this was finally happening. My denial began to subside and I accepted that I was going to finally meet my baby and have the home birth I always wanted. I cried on and off for some time and it felt good to release and sit in those emotions. My midwife arrived at 8:50 AM. I cried a little more as I hugged her. She knew how badly I wanted this experience for myself and my family. We did so much work together over the months to get to that point and I felt happy and relieved that the day was finally here. I was also feeling very grateful that she was going to be the one there to help guide me through the experience. 

I texted my aunt around 9:15 AM asking how far she was. She said she was on the Bay Bridge and would arrive by 9:45 AM. We took some final baby belly photos and continued setting up the house. She got there just in time! My wave sensations were intensifying more and I wanted to get in the tub for some water relief. I had contemplated for my entire pregnancy as to whether or not I would get a birth tub but ultimately decided not to. Although my first labor ended in a c-section delivery, I was fully dilated within a few short hours and knew that statistically second babies come faster. I was worried that I would spend $200-$300 on a birth tub and not have time to set it up or use it. So instead we used the bathtub in our apartment. I had a blow-up pool pillow which helped keep my head and neck comfortable as I submerged my body into the water. The water helped a bit but because my belly wasn’t fully submerged I thought to myself, “I wish I got the birth tub!” My contractions spread out for some time and it was the first break I had for hours. I asked my midwife if it was okay that this was happening even though I knew many times this was normal before the end of labor. She assured me that it was and I just relaxed. I stayed in the water for a while, but once the water became cool, I got out to labor in the bedroom. 

After getting out of the tub, I leaned on my knees against the bed. A gush of blood came out and shortly after my water broke at 10:25 AM. I was looking down between my legs as my waters released and I saw it happen which was pretty cool! It was a strong stream of liquid but not as much as I thought it would be. After my water broke, I continued to lose some blood. My husband looked a little worried and my midwife had a pensive expression as she was trying to understand where the blood was coming from. I knew that losing some blood was normal but it seemed to be more than we all expected. I thought to myself, “If I have to transfer to the hospital for a hemorrhage after doing all this work- I’m going to be pissed!” I looked up at my husband who was standing across the room and said, “You look worried,” He enthusiastically responded, “No! I’m not worried,” and jumped across the bed to be by my side. I knew he was lying but it still brought me some comfort, lol. My midwife continued to keep an eye on the blood and said she wasn’t worried but just serious as ensured it was in normal range.

My labor intensified even more after my water broke. I became so uncomfortable and kept trying different positions. I got onto the bed and tried laying on my side but I wanted my legs spread and said “I wish I had a peanut ball.” My midwife immediately suggested putting the stack of towels we had set aside in between my legs. This helped me keep my legs open while also allowing them to rest. I turned from the left to the right and couldn’t find comfort. I tried laying on all fours on top of the bed with three pillows under my chest. I exclaimed, “I’m so uncomfortable!” I went back onto the floor when I said, “I’m fucking crazy for wanting this!” and “I don’t wanna do this anymore!” I was so ready to be done with the process and bring my baby earthside. I couldn’t imagine laboring at this intensity for several more hours. Deep down, I knew this meant that I was likely in transition and the end was near. My midwife suggested trying out the birth stool to bring the baby down faster. I had always been curious about birth stools but at that moment I was not a fan… I asked to get back into the tub and as we were filling it up, my husband and I stood outside the bathroom door and hugged. For the majority of my labor, I did not want to be touched during contractions. I had wondered if I would want counter pressure, etc. but instead, I wanted space and requested things like water and coconut water in between waves. This was one of the first moments where I really felt like I needed to be held by him. His embrace during those moments gave me the strength and encouragement I needed to keep going. 

Once I got back into the tub we were in the final stretch. I tried laying on my sides as I did earlier but it did not bring relief this time. I looked at my midwife and asked her to talk to me. I needed extra support and encouragement in the last stages. She quickly jumped to be by my side, held my hand, caressed my hair, and reassured me that my body was working hard to bring my baby earthside. I went on all fours and bellowed through each contraction as I clenched a comb. The comb method did not distract me from the pain, but it did help me feel like I could channel my energy and power in a more purposeful way. My midwife provided perineum support, when needed, as my husband stood nearby filming. My midwife mentioned seeing the baby’s head and I responded, “I FEEL IT!” Moments later, I let out a huge burp which was powerful and hilarious in the moment. During previous sessions with my midwife, she had explained that burping can actually act as an emotional release. I’ve always been a big burper so this was very fitting. Shortly after my big burp, I felt the ring of fire and my baby’s head *finally* coming down. I rocked my hips forward and backward as I exclaimed, “AAAHHH FUUUCCCK!” At that moment, it was euphoric and such a relief. I knew we were down to the last moments and I was so excited. The ring of fire didn’t last as long or burn as much as I thought it would, but it was definitely noticeable. I let out a guttural, “OH MY GODDD!” and we began to drain the water in the tub. She signaled to my husband to switch places so he could catch the baby as they emerged. I groaned, “Oooh!” as their head came out. Baby began crying before they were fully earthside (which is unusual) and I said to them, “Hi baby, we’re almost there! We’re almost there baby.” Two more pushes and baby came straight out with their arms crossed, covered in vernix and blood, caught by their daddy at 11:12 AM (after about 40 minutes of pushing). “Love and Happiness” by Al Green played in the background and my husband exclaimed with tears of joy and relief, “They’re here baby. They’re here baby. It’s a baby girl!” and I responded, “Awww, I told you it was a girl!” She let out a strong cry and I said, “Hi, my sweet girl!” as I cried. Then, I flipped my leg over her head to hold her. I tried pulling her up to my chest but the cord was still attached and wouldn’t reach past my breasts. Once she was in my arms her crying subsided. I asked if she needed suction because she was gurgling a bit of blood. My midwife said “no” likely because she had already cried, was alert, and had a good tone. I requested that my aunt and son come in to meet her immediately. They came in, said a short hello right after she was born, and then went back to another room to play. We stayed in the tub for a few more minutes, as I caught my breath, and then I was ready to get out. My midwife quickly began to facilitate our exit. When I began to stand up my placenta plopped straight out and we both began to laugh. It had only been 4 minutes so we didn’t expect it! I was so happy that it came out quickly and easily. She mentioned that the bleeding during labor may have been from the placenta slowly separating earlier on. She also later explained that our baby didn’t do the typical external rotation she sees and how this was unique and likely due to having a wide pelvis. She suspected this in earlier visits and said it could be why I have had faster labors with both my babies. 

After bringing my baby earthside, I laid on the bed and didn’t feel that well. My labor and baby’s delivery took everything out of me physically. I was sweating and exhausted from exerting so much energy since the early morning. I had also lost a decent amount of blood which took an extra toll on me, even though it was still in the range of normal. I was in some pain afterward and went in between feeling hot and cold with mild shakes. To re-fuel, I had a raspberry popsicle, hot tea, and beef stew that I had prepared as a freezer meal. Then I took a short shower and felt much better. I felt a little guilty that I couldn’t just lay down and hold my baby, but I needed to tend to myself so that I could spend quality time with her later. Her daddy held her skin-to-skin on his chest as she slept. I am not big on taking pain medication but decided to take some to ease the discomfort, that way I could really relax and finally spend some quality time with my brand-new baby girl! As I lay beside her, I asked my husband, “Should we still name her Soleia?” and he said, “Yes, of course!” Our sunshine girl was born during a heatwave, on the hottest day that week, and the name suits her perfectly. 

We left her placenta attached for three hours (a partial lotus birth) until the cord turned white and stopped pulsing completely. Her placenta was in the shape of a heart and also had a Marginal Cord Insertion which was not caught during her 20-week anatomy scan. My son had a Velamentous Cord Insertion which is similar but more extreme. It’s not common for this to happen in general, but especially for consecutive pregnancies. I was surprised at the similarity and relieved that it wasn’t a stress factor during my second pregnancy. 

So many aspects of my second labor reminded me of my first (prior to surgery). From the exact same gestation (at 38 weeks + 3 days) to the speed at which my contractions progressed. I’m grateful to have had the support I wanted and needed this time around. The midwife we chose was the perfect fit for our family. I have so much love for her and the way she practices and holds space for birthing women. I dreamt of a natural birth my entire life and it was amazing to have had one in my own home with an intimate birth team. Even though it was extremely intense, I remember that day fondly and wish I could experience it all over again. There were so many funny, poetic, and synchronistic moments from Soleia’s birth that I will cherish for a lifetime and will be forever thankful to have experienced.