Last week was rough to say the least. In fact, I wrote this post while I was locked out of my house after an already stressful morning. To be honest, I’m not the kind of person who is naturally overtly optimistic. I don’t consider myself incredibly pessimistic either, but instead more so of a realist. I spent a lot of time wishing I was engrained with a different mindset rather than what naturally felt right. However, a few years back I decided to just accept who I am and act accordingly, rather than continue trying to put on a front for others. After all, it’s sort of in my nature to prefer “a little bit of this and a little bit of that,” in all aspects of my life. This decision was incredibly liberating and helped relieve a lot of my anxiety. I understand that we all have struggles and I am not being melodramatic, but sometimes I feel like my life is a soap opera. At times I have an outer body experience and I’m just like- Really?! Seriously?! Why?!
Ever since I was little, life has thrown hurdle after hurdle my way which has made me a resilient and empathetic person. In challenging moments I tell myself “this will pass” or “it could be worse” and “this is just a test of patience.” However, at times I can’t help but feel beaten down. I mean... I’m only human. To an extent, I do believe that strong people are dealt a more difficult set of cards because we can handle it, but sometimes I wish I didn’t have to constantly suck it up. Sometimes I just want things to be easy. Sometimes I just want to bask in my happiness without being surprised with something challenging or upsetting.
I believe in feeling the feels, so once I release the tension and come out of my frustration, I am able to accept once again that this is just how my life is. There's something between the chemistry of the universe and I that won't let me escape this pattern. Therefore, I've learned to just ride the waves as they come like the Pisces that I am. I remind myself that I have to continue pushing through it and I’m learning to not get worked up as quickly when something goes wrong.
I recognize on a deep level that we cannot control what happens to us, but we can control how we react and how we handle situations. So, I’m doing my best to learn how to continue pursuing a more positive mindset, regardless of what’s happening on the outside. At this point I have accepted that is all I have control over. With that being said, this doesn't mean I'm going to be super bubbly all the time, but I am doing my best to calm the storm when it begins to brew.
The reason I am sharing this is because writing is therapeutic for me and I hope that sharing my experiences can help others who are in the same boat, but may feel alone. Now, let's pray that this week is better than the last!
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Life is full of surprises. Sometimes we receive wonderful news that we never expected, and other times we hope that the bad news is a blessing in disguise. Earlier this week I received some relatively bad news. I say relatively because in the big scheme of things it could be worse. However, considering the circumstances I felt cheated and heartbroken.
Ever since last semester, I had been sharing with my audience that I was on track to graduate once the fall semester was complete. I don't like jinxing myself so I would always add, "If all goes well,” but this declaration wasn’t enough to shield me from the bad news. On Tuesday, I went to a graduation workshop to learn how to properly apply for graduation and to triple check that all my requirements were fulfilled. That’s when I learned that I was short 11 units. Some of you may be wondering, “How did you not know that?!” Well, I met with two professors for advising last semester, one of which being the department chair for my major, and both professors told me that I was on track to graduate the following semester.
So, you can imagine the horror I felt when I learned that both of these professors were in fact wrong. I couldn’t hold the tears back and suddenly found myself mourning the future I had been planning. Everything I had in store is now going to be held back by at least five months. Five months may not seem like long time, but I am 28 years old. At this point, I am beyond ready to start my life outside of college, which is why this news came like a punch to the gut. I wanted to take this negative experience and share how I deal when life throws me a curveball.
1. Feel the Feels
Although I am a very sensitive person, there are times that I set my emotions aside in order to put on a straight face- especially in a professional setting. However, when something big happens in my personal life, I believe in releasing the emotions. The first thing I recommend doing when life surprises you with negative news is to let the feelings out. Once the emotions have been released you will be one step closer to moving on.
After the graduation workshop, I had class. I was so upset and heartbroken that I couldn’t hold it in as much as I tried. I sat and listened to the lecture with tears running down my face for a few minutes because I had to let myself release the anger and frustration. I gave myself a few minutes to quietly cry in the corner then I was able to suck it up until I got home later that day.
Once you release the emotions and understand the gravity of the situation the second step is to accept the circumstances. Although I feel it is important to feel the feels, I do not believe in dwelling in a negative space. Once you accept the position you are in, you will be able to start thinking about how to move forward.
When I got the news, I frantically texted my loved ones and shared the bad news because I needed some comfort. When I got home later that day, I cried in my boyfriend’s arms. Once I was done feeling sorry for myself, I was ready to accept the situation for what it was.
3. Make a Plan
Once you reach acceptance it is time to transform your pain into power and begin planning the next steps. Although we cannot predict when life will surprise us, we do have control over how we handle the situation once we receive the news. Do not remain stagnant, instead create a plan.
For my situation, the add/drop deadline ends on 9/17 so I began searching for any last minute classes I could add, sending out emails, and scheduling meetings. I am currently in conversation with several resources to try and solve this problem as best I can before the deadline.
4. Move forward
Once the emotions have passed and you create a plan it is time to move forward and execute the plan. Regardless of what life throws your way, you always have the capability to move forward. Moving on will look different for each scenario, but pushing yourself to do so will be empowering.
Right now, I am still in the process of moving on. I am still researching and exploring different plans. I want to find the best way to right this wrong and regain some of the time and money I have lost. I hope to be in this phase by early next week.
5. Don't Be Surprised When it Happens Again
The last step is to realize that it wont be the last time life throws you a curveball. No matter how much planning you do, or how good of a person you are, it is inevitable that life will continue to surprise you. As I mentioned in the beginning, life is full of surprises, and the best way we can prepare is to be emotionally ready to repeat these steps when the next one hits.
Change is the only predictable thing about life. Although I hope there will be no additional surprises when it comes to completing my degree, I am also aware that there will be many more times when unpredictable scenarios are thrown my way. The fact that I have been able to move forward in the past, allows me to feel more prepared regardless of what the next situation will be.
I hope that sharing my experience and tips can help you deal a little better the next time you are surprised with news you didn't expect. How do you deal when life throws you a curveball?
I wanted to take a moment to thank you for 10,000 followers on Instagram! I’m so grateful for the experiences thus far and am thrilled to see what the future holds. Whether you have been with me since the start, or joined me recently, I am so thankful to share these special moments with you. In leu of this long-awaited accomplishment, I felt like sharing some of my thoughts and experiences up until this point.
Although I only recently hit the 10K mark on Instagram, I have been blogging for some time now, and have been so eager to reach this milestone! My journey first began as a sporadic hobby around 2010-2011. This was before Instagram was popular, Tumblr was poppin’, and I also had a Facebook Like Page. My Tumblr was full of re-posts, selfies, and personal mementos, while my Facebook was focused on fashion styling lessons. Most of my original blogging accounts have since been deleted or abandoned, but my interest in documenting photos and expressing myself through writing has never wavered.
In June of 2015, I was going through a hard time, and felt like I needed to re-channel my energy into an artistic outlet. I made the decision to commit to blogging and began taking photos as often as possible. Although I had been blogging on some level for a few years, my posts were sporadic up until that point. However, that summer I hit the ground running. I began taking outfit photos weekly, bought a point and shoot camera, networked at events, and collaborated with lots of brands and photographers.
Although I was working consistently, my growth was stagnant for several years. I struggled with constructing a “theme” and cohesive editing for the longest time and only got into a groove this past March. I am by no means an expert, and am constantly working to learn more and perfect my craft, but this was the first time my feed began coming together. I had recently chopped my mermaid hair into a bob, found a new filter on VSCO, and began experimenting more with editing techniques on Snapseed. The combination of these changes resulted in the perfect recipe for the most growth I have seen in my entire blogging career.
Part of me feels like I've been on this journey for a while, but the other part feels it has just begun. I am so happy that I persisted and trudged through those first few years because I finally found my mojo. Following my heart resulted in one of the best decisions I have ever made and brought new purpose into my life. I am very excited for what the future holds, and so grateful that you've decided to join me along for the ride.
I hope that sharing some details on my journey inspire you to pursue something you are passionate about, regardless of what that looks like for you. Blogging hasn't always been easy, but it has changed my life for the better, and I would love to encourage others to follow their hearts just as I did. Cheers!
As a full-time student, puppy mom, and blogger, I'm always on the go. I'm the kind of person who prefers to make coffee at home which is why I am so excited to add this Asobu travel bottle to my collection. (ad) I make an effort to stay hydrated and also like to use it for water when I'm out and about! It keeps cool liquids cold for up to 24 hours and warm liquids hot for up to 8 hours by utilizing a design that incorporates copper and vacuum insulation. The travel mug is also leak proof which I really appreciate, because I had a mishap several months ago with another mug, and spilled coffee all over my brand new foam mattress! The other mug I had, had a complicated design that resulted in a faulty and insecure lid. However, this one has a simple design which is easy to drink from and clean.
I chose the Le Baton style in a white and copper color combination, but there are many more colors and designs available on AsobuBottle.com. Which would you choose?!